A couple of years back I wrote a piece titled, Are You in a Holding Pattern?
If so, it was time for a landing… Far too much time has been spent on Holding Patterns. You’ve taken off countless times with no landing. Feeling that the conditions are unfavorable to land. Waiting for the perfect timing, waiting, and delaying, trying to allow others to secure their landing first. Concerned about everyone else, will they be ok or feel abandoned if I went ahead of them? Wondering if you have enough support to act now. Although, the Control Tower, the one that controls all, had given the clearance to land. The Lord has assured you that the conditions are optimal, and you have been cleared for a safe landing.
Now that the landing has taken place, you are no longer in a Holding Pattern, it’s important to manually navigate your journey of (re)discovery by being present, connected, and true to the Gift Called “You”. If you don’t you will find yourself living your life on Autopilot.
Maybe you are already there. Are you doing the same routine day after day, never remembering what you did the day before? Or even wondering what day it is? Do you have anything to look forward to? If you’re just focused on just getting through the day-to-day you have forgotten about your “Why”. The reason why you’re doing what you do, you are probably living your life and the relationships in it on autopilot.
The devastating part about living life on autopilot, especially when it comes to your relationships, is that you don’t even know that you’re doing it half the time. You’re just living your life, going through the motions wishing for more, but not sure, if there is more or how to get it. While many people live their entire lives on autopilot (which is truly sad), the way to have truly rewarding and successful lives & relationships is to be fully aware and adaptable when it comes to life. So, how do you do that?
1. Stop and smell the roses (literally): Take time to notice all the little things around you that you always used to look at when you were 6 years old!!!
· Pause and Reflect
· Take more Pictures
· Connect with Others and Nature
2. Think about your short and long-term goals. Do you still have those? And if so – have you forgotten them? Or are your goals different, from what you thought would please others? Re-write that list and start working on accomplishing your true short-term goals.
· (re)Set a goal or two
· Write down the steps needed to achieve them
· Track each step
3. Remember your relationship(s)? When was the last time you did something new with him/her? When was the last time you even wanted to? Start thinking about your relationships and stop just “being in it”.
· Do Something Different
· Practice being Present (Mindfulness)
· Cut down on social media and electronics
Finally, if you are on autopilot there’s a reason why. Your life is out of sync. It’s either too stressful, too complicated, too boring, or you have surrendered your life to the routine. I’m asking you to take one day this week and really think about your life and relationships. How can you shake things up? Make them interesting? How can you get back in sync and in love with your life again?
I appreciate the fact that God continued to replenish and refuel us during those times. He instructed us to land but we continued to hover, remaining suspended in one place in the air. Don’t you think we have hindered and blocked ourselves for much too long to end up on autopilot?
The journey you’re currently on and the place you’re in, what is your spirit speaking to you? God has prepared you for something Great. Let’s embrace the fact, we do not have to see it all, that would not be Faith. We do not have to know all the answers, He is the ultimate Tour Guide for the journey of (re)discovering the Gift Called You”.
So, what has God told you to do that you haven’t started doing yet? What are you waiting for? God has your best interests at heart. Go ahead and do what he’s told you to do. He’s making it Christal Clear.
Prayer: Father God thank you for your strong presence of timing. I feel the soft breeze as you continue to blow all internal and external hindrances and obstacles away. Lord, I invite you each day to a renewed cleansing of my fears, insecurities, discouragements, and heaviness that makes me want to quit and disconnect to be demolished. Amen!
When you think of April, May, and June, you probably think of Spring, the time for deep cleaning, purging, and decluttering inside the house. Perhaps it’s you cleaning the yard, pulling out all the dead to make room for the new growth. I want to challenge you to flashback to the beginning of this year and look at the goals and aspirations you set for the year. Now take the following steps necessary to do a deep cleansing of the who(s) and what(s) that have caused distractions in life to get you off course. Make a list of what worked well and another list of what did not.
Ask these questions: How are things going? How, what, and where can I improve to better move toward the goal? What do I need to let go of? This will direct the areas of focus to optimize your “cleaning” efforts.
7 Steps to Self Cleaning
Rediscover the Gift Called “Me”
You are a gift to this world. You are special, uniquely made for such a time as this. Explore and discover something new about your awesomeness and what gives you inspiration and joy. Through prayer and spending quiet time with the Creator, reclaim your strength and inner peace. Get back to the precious gift that you call “Me”.
Clear your Mind
Woosah, clear your mind as much as possible. There is always so much going on inside our heads. Daily meditation is a wonderful way to clear your mind.
Check your attitude, you create more of what you think, your mindset is everything. It affects you and everyone else. Try journaling your thoughts, even if you must shred them because you cursed someone out. Be angry and sin not. Breathe and let that, Sh*t Go!!! You will feel much lighter. Get it out, if you do not it will create a stench, that is unbearable. Reality check: Stop trying to fit everything and everyone in, focus on priorities and release everything else that sucks the life out of you.
Clean up your Relationships
Look closely at all your relationships? How are they doing? You may need to end unhealthy relationships or reach out and reconnect with old friends. Are your loved ones your priority? How are you utilizing your time towards your relationships, is it quality? Are you present, mindful, multitasking (working), or on phone/social media?
Tidy Up Your Habits
What unhealthy habits do you need to eliminate before they cost you dearly? Replace them by focusing on building new positive habits.
Examine Your Healthily Living
Time to get physical. Do you have a fitness routine? Springtime is an exciting time to get outdoors, take walks and do some gardening. What are your fuel sources? Hydrate… I have an app that reminds me to drink water. I am working at responding timely to the alerts, as I build new habits. I find it helpful if I keep a water bottle near me. Increase your natural whole foods, fruits, and vegetables.
Get rid of the Clutter
Spring clean, all your spaces, the junk drawers, the closet (if it does not fit do not force it), the car, workspace, and all the spaces you spend time in. How many of the apps on your phone do you actually use? How many contacts and photos are on your phone that you do not need? What do your mail and emails look like? Have an unsubscribing session for those that no longer serve you. Delete!!! Delete!!! Delete!!! Unfriend and unfollow all negativity.
Polish your Finances
Yes, I am a witness that our God will make a way out of no way. But there is something called Stewardship. Are you a good steward of your finances? Is there a need to rob Peter to pay Paul? This means it is not enough money to go around, so you are taking from one source to pay another. Review and refresh your Financial Plan. Proverbs 21:5 – The plans of the diligent lead to profit as surely as haste leads to poverty. Is the goal debt elimination, savings, retirement, home, travel, adjusting to living within your means, or all the above and then some? Take a close look at your money coming in and the money you got going out. How is it working for you? Is there a need to adjust your budget?
Prayer:
Dear Heavenly Father, it’s Springtime. Open up the windows of heaven and let your freshness blow, filling my mind with clarity. Let me experience the fragrance of your divine healing, emotional and physical. Help me to be the amazing gift that you created Called “Me”. Restore me, renew me, and cleanse me. I long to be a person after Your own heart, show me how I ought to live. Instruct me in Your ways, and walk beside me every moment of every day. ~ Amen
I’m sure that like most folks, that just before midnight on December 31, 2019. All that I could anticipate was that 2020 would be nothing other than a year of wonder and excitement as we entered into a new decade. However, 2020 had some tricks up its sleeve that none of us were expecting. Yes, we entered into a global pandemic, a political melee, social disturbance and those were just the things that were happening outside of my doorsteps. Within my home I became a full-time elementary teacher and this change really grounded me and ultimately it was for the better.
In 2020, I launched my series of 90-day planners, The Gift Called “Me” and this was the start of making my business Christal Clear Vision a full reality, this has been something that I have dreamt about for years. As much as I was thinking that I would “work” the business, the business actually turned out to be working on “ME”. I started this business to be a source of strength and encouragement for women over 40 who have various tasks of being a mom, a wife, a sister, an aunt or care-taker of aging parents. All of these things add enuremable stress to our life on top of trying to feign out successful careers and finding time for self-care.
However, 2020 allowed me the needed rest, to really focus on my visions for my business, for myself and for my family. I think that is the greatest gift of all in 2020 was rest. Our world was forced to slow down and I think we all really needed that to better understand ourselves, our neighbors and our purposes.
Not only were many given the gift of rest from the world’s hustle and bustle it also reignited the importance of relationships. Relationships are quintessential. Relationship is what God wants from us.
In these unprecedented times, COVID-19 has provided the opportunity for all of us to reevaluate how we live. In doing so, families have had to make important decisions to adjust, manage, and restructure both their family lives as well as their work environments. Many parents find that they also need to be a virtual learning support coach in order to help their children stay engaged while learning from home. So, how exactly do parents balance work and virtual learning?
Childcare can be a very costly, stressful, and frankly scary thing to navigate when parents have to work during a pandemic. A few ideas to consider
Small groups of parents and/or families could create community learning circles (using safe distancing guidelines), to help share the burden of childcare.
Parent(s) could check into the Family Leave options at their job, and if doable arrange to take some time off to care for the kids.
A last resort would be for a parent to extend their leave or quit their job altogether. Only if you can afford to do so.
Here are a few Dos and Don’ts for parents to help ensure your child’s virtual learning success:
DO
Establish a daily routine: Eat Healthily, Drink Plenty of Water, Exercise, and Get 7-8 Hours of
Restorative Sleep.
Provide a quiet learning space in the house with limited distractions and background noises.
Ensure your student is on time to virtual school!
Make sure that your child dresses appropriately for virtual school.
Communicate with the teacher(s) in advance to get the details of the information and resources
your child will need for each class, including homework.
Be sure to review the virtual learning etiquette guidelines, provided by the school, with your
child(ren).
Express high expectations and standards for your child’s learning.
Encourage your student to participate in extra-curricular activities, if available.
DON’T
Don’t interrupt the virtual learning sessions. If you have questions or concerns, please reach out to the teacher via email. (Remember: This is a special time for students to meet with their teachers and classmates, so it is vital that the adults at home be quiet observers.)
We know that this pandemic won’t last forever. In the meantime, parents are challenged with the task to be a virtual learning coach while their kids learn from home. But, with help from school districts, the community, and employers, parents will be able to balance work and virtual learning.
Internet resource Medical News Today describes mental health as: “cognitive, behavioral, and emotional well-being.” It is a reflection of our overall healthfulness. Women, because of their busy schedules and attention to the needs of others don’t always leave time to attend to their mental health. But it is important for women to make space to engage in their own emotional, mental, and physical fitness in order to be around to help others.
Mental health can be measured by how well we manage our anxiety, mood, and stress levels. Experts point to a healthy lifestyle as the key to emotional, mental, and physical wellness. For example, eating healthy, sleeping well, and exercising is key.
First, what we eat does play a pivotal role in helping us to improve our moods, our ability to sleep, and may increase our ability to move our bodies more.
How? When we eat a well-balanced diet of healthy fruit, vegetables, whole grains, legumes, heart-healthy fats like avocado, nuts, and seeds, and moderate amounts of lean meats, seafood, and poultry, research shows we feel better.
Also, experts recommend that if we make sleep a priority, it will be easier to maintain other
health behaviors. Restorative sleep will help us to be more alert and energized. When we have a sufficient amount of energy, we can better manage unhealthy anxiety and stress. Dr. Andrew Weil author of the book Mind Over Meds exhorts the following, “Evidence for the health benefits of exercise is overwhelming. Increased physical activity can effectively prevent and treat depression, help normalize high blood pressure, and, along with dietary adjustment, but many cases of type 2 diabetes into complete remission.” (pg. 6) Although most people move around for school and work (inside or outside the home), we could all stand to add some intentional physical activity specifically for our heart and mental health.
Finally, if you are unable to get the nutrition, rest, and exercise that your body needs, I encourage you to seek the support of a nutritionist. Sometimes we need a little additional guidance. The heart of the matter is that a healthy diet, restorative sleep, and regular exercise can help women improve and maintain great mental health.
Often when we hear the word beans we think of flatulence (a.k.a. gas). It’s true that some people do experience intestinal intolerance when consuming beans. But, the benefits of eating beans far outweigh this minor discomfort.
However, we can mitigate the severity of the experience by maintaining a well-balanced lifestyle. Which includes healthy eating, regular exercise, restorative sleep, and staying hydrated by drinking plenty of water.
As long as you do not have a health-related condition that will preclude you from eating beans, then consider adding this heart-healthy, high protein, complex carbohydrate, folate, and iron packed food to your diet.
Black Bean Tortilla Soup (Serves 4)
1 Tbs. olive oil
2 tsp. minced garlic
½ tsp. ground cumin
½ tsp. chili powder
2 cans (14.5 ounces each) diced tomatoes in juice
2 cans (15.5 ounces each) black beans, rinsed and drained
2 cups vegetable broth
1 package (10 ounces) frozen corn kernels (do not thaw)
1 cup water
Salt and Pepper to taste
1 cup crumbled tortilla chips, plus more for serving (optional)
1 Tbs. fresh lime juice, plus lime wedges for serving.
1. In a large saucepan, heat olive oil over medium. Add garlic, cumin, and chili powder and cook, stirring until fragrant, about 1 minute. Add tomatoes (with their juice), beans, broth, corn, and the water; season with salt and pepper.
2. Bring soup to a boil; reduce to a simmer. Add tortilla chips; cook until softened, about 2 minutes. Remove from heat; stir in lime juice, and season with salt and pepper.
Dr. Michael Greger in his book, How Not to Die: Discover the Foods Scientifically Proven to Prevent and Reverse Disease writes, “Eating greens nearly every day may be one of the most powerful steps you can take to prolong your life. Of all the food groups analyzed by a team of Harvard University researchers, greens turned out to be associated with the strongest protection against major chronic diseases, including up to about a 20 percent reduction in risk for both heart attacks and strokes for every additional daily serving.” (p. 312) So, become a mean, greens, eating machine!
1 ½ lbs. Swiss Chard (1 large or 2 medium bunches), stemmed, leaves torn into large pieces (substitute other greens if you prefer)
1. Heat the 2 teaspoons olive oil in a large skillet over medium-high heat. Add the onion and season with salt and pepper. Cook, stirring occasionally, until the onion is browned, 8 to 10 minutes. Add the stock, reduce the heat to medium-low, and simmer for 6 minutes.
2. Transfer the onion to a bowl and return the skillet to medium-high heat. Add the 1 tablespoon olive oil; then add the Swiss chard. Season lightly with salt and pepper and cook, tossing, for 2 to 3 minutes. Return the onion to the skillet, toss to combine, and serve.
Picture for a minute a giant bowl of fresh fruit such as: berries, citrus, melons, and stone fruit. What a luscious imagining? The mere thought of fragrant, fresh, juicy, succulent fruit causes our salivary glands to activate.
Fruits are an excellent source of vitamins, minerals, and heart-healthy antioxidants. In fact, some research shows that eating certain fruit can even help lower blood pressure. Dr. Oz in Food Can Fix It: The Superfood Switch to Fight Fat, Defy Aging, and Eat Your Way Healthy explains, “fiber in fruit slows the absorption of sugar, and that’s a good thing because it prevents that sudden spill of glucose into your bloodstream.” (p. 43)
Spicy Apple Snack (Serves 2)
1 lg. Granny Smith apple, halved, core removed
2 Tbs. peanut butter, divided
Cinnamon, ground
1. Cut apple in half vertically, and with a melon baller or small spoon scoop out the core and seeds.
2. Spread each apple half with a tablespoon of peanut butter, and sprinkle with cinnamon.
Enjoy beans, greens, and fruity things as part of a heart-healthy diet!
